What I KNOW – Humans Disappoint, God Doesn’t

For as long as I can remember, one of the main driving forces in my life has been the desire to not disappoint. My parents’ form of discipline wasn’t “spare the rod, spoil the child” even though a good spanking wasn’t frowned upon back in those days. My parents’ form of discipline was more subtle but still very powerful. Somehow, they subtly and lovingly got it across to us kids what they expected of us and I never wanted to disappoint them. I unknowingly adopted that same parenting style for my own children.

To me, there is nothing more gut-wrenching and self-deflating than knowing that I have disappointed someone I love. It’s the sneaky motive behind my tendency for people pleasing.

I put a lot of pressure on myself to anticipate and provide everything everyone needs which is down- right ridiculous. Somehow, in my mind, I see it as attainable if I just work hard enough at it. But no matter how hard you work at remembering birthdays, sending thank you notes, staying connected to friends, acknowledging achievements, expressing condolences, offering help, or curbing sarcastic remarks, you are bound to disappoint someone, somewhere along the way.

My latest bout of disappointing a loved one has brought me to a breaking point in this crazy thinking. After much self-induced angst and cycles of beating myself up, then beating the other person up (figuratively speaking), I have reached a moment of grace in it all. God has reminded me that I, a human, will disappoint. Disappointment is inevitable. We can’t live up to anyone else’s expectations all of the time.

We will inevitably and often unintentionally make choices in our words and actions that disappoint others. There is no way around it. The sooner we can accept that truth, the more at peace we can be. The more loving we can be to ourselves.

Realizing I am not God, and only God doesn’t disappoint, has brought moments of peace to my crazy thinking.

I was able to hand the person over to God and ask that He meet her in that disappointment and offer some relief and meet me in my angst and offer me some relief. And He did.

I disappoint, God does not.

This I KNOW.

What do you KNOW?

Joan