Stumbling Blocks

I was listening to a podcast with Fr. Richard Rohr last week and realized I am in good company.

He was talking about stumbling blocks in our lives and mentioned one of his stumbling blocks is how he approaches life with a very analytical frame of mind. He sees everything and everybody as flawed and seems to think he knows how everything and everybody could be better. And feels a responsibility to fix these things.

That’s me.

I never really thought about it that way but it’s true.

He gives an example of a beautiful tree he saw that had one dead branch mixed in amongst the others and all he could see was that dead branch. He recognized the beauty but it was lessened by the imperfection. His thoughts were more about “How could he fix that?” “Doesn’t anybody else see this?” than “What a gift in the beauty of this tree!”

I’ve been trying to remember just when I adopted this analytical bent and why? They say these kinds of characteristics become our default as a result of childhood influences and defense mechanisms we adopted to survive in life. I haven’t quite figured it out yet. Maybe I should just stop analyzing it and work on changing it.

Rohr said he forced himself to just leave the tree as is and to focus on seeing past the imperfections to the beauty.

Imagine if we could do that with the people in our lives, the people in the news, the church, the world.

How arrogant of me to think I know what is better for everyone and everything. But, isn’t wanting better for someone or some situation showing I care, showing I love? Or is it a selfish way to make my life better, by making you or it better?

It takes discipline, sternness, and work to maintain life like this, a life of order. As a result, life loses some of its joy.

Rohr says, “Stumbling blocks trip us into the second half of life where the pursuit of order gives in to acceptance and freedom.” Sounds lovely. To be able to accept things and people as they are. To believe that where we are at each moment in our lives is exactly where God wants us to be and every encounter with another is leading us on a path that isn’t random. Imagine the freedom in a life like that.

What is a stumbling block in your approach to life? How do you try to keep order at the cost of joy?  Wouldn’t it feel great not to stumble anymore?

Joan