The Report Card

It’s that time of year when Parent-Teacher Conferences take place in many schools. Back when my kids were in grade school, it was only the parents that met with the teachers, not the students. Now, very often, the children accompany their parents. That way the child gets a progress report in person. How reassuring for them to know exactly what is expected of them and how encouraging for them to know they are on the right track, or if there are areas for improvement, that there is support.

In a discussion at Firstfruits this week, one of the participants bemoaned the fact that we don’t get progress reports from God. We don’t know if we are living up to expectations. There is no report card and no way to know for sure if we are on the right track or where we need improvement. This doubt and uncertainty can be subtle, lying right below the surface of all our good intentions, causing a lot of unnecessary worry, and robbing us of the assurance and peace that comes with the loving relationship that God wants to have with us.

So often, we measure progress in our spiritual life by things we do or should do. We can so easily compare ourselves to others and feel as if we fall short. I’ve heard people say they wonder if God is disappointed in them, or frustrated with them, or sometimes even wonder if God does love them. I hear it often, women who feel as if they aren’t doing, giving, or being enough.

I don’t think God wants it to be so complicated.

In Mary Oliver’s poem entitled Sometimes, she writes:

Instructions for living a life:
            Pay attention
            Be astonished
            Tell about it.

I believe these three tasks sum up what God’s expectations are of us. This is our homework, and if we are doing these three things as best we can, as often as we can, and with as much love as we can, we are doing just fine.

Pay attention
Don’t sleepwalk through life. Do everything you can to stay alert, and aware of God’s presence and power all around you, every minute of every day. Each breath we take whispers God’s presence. Listen and look for the songs and the dances of God’s presence in your ordinary life. Look for it in nature, in family, in friendships, and in the stranger. Once you find it, pay attention to what it is trying to tell you. Maybe it’s telling you to enjoy and rest, or maybe it’s calling you to loving action. If we pay attention to God’s presence and promptings in our ordinary, everyday life, we will know what His will is for us in each situation. We will know what is expected of us, so we never have to feel like we’ve fallen short. Pay attention.

Be astonished
We must never take for granted the love of God. It’s quite astonishing. The fact that God knows us inside and out, and still loves us with a love that never ends, is almost too much to process. In spite of our weaknesses and failings, God still loves us and invites us to partner with Him to bring goodness to the world. He depends on us to be His presence in our world of influence. It’s not about who we are, but it’s about who He is in us, and how He works through us. It’s quite astonishing. Never lose your sense of astonishment at the love of God for you, and the power that love has when we let it flow through us. Be astonished.

Tell about it
This is where our real homework comes in. In response to the wonders revealed when we pay attention and the knowledge of the astonishing truth of God’s love, we are called to tell about it. We have to wake the sleepwalking and prod the lukewarm with our own stories of God’s presence and power in our lives. We aren’t all called to actually use words to tell about it. Our loving actions and quiet example, when guided by God’s will, are just as powerful as words. Tell about it.

What grade would you give yourself this week in the school of discipleship? How well have you paid attention? How willing were you to be astonished? Where did your words or actions tell about it? Is there room for improvement?

Joan